“Why are you fighting? What’s the matter now? Oya, leave her, you too leave her cloth. Can’t you hear me?” I screamed at Morili and Areni who were wrangling, both of them seething in anger as they send their wigs flying in the air like the furs of angry lions. “Can’t any of you answer me?” I said trying to make eye contact with them. None of them was looking at my direction. They kept a cold stare at each other and seemed like they would snare again the next minute. Their eyes were red and their clothes half torn. “What’s the problem?” I asked again.
“This idiot, this idiot came on Instagram to body shame me, this one that looks like a hungry cat is trolling me, I will finish you today” Areni answered me, breathing like a toad that swallowed a stone. One could tell she had no more physical strength to carry on with the fight but her mouth was projecting the opposite.
“It is okay, please” I tried calming her down. I could count the veins in her body at that moment; the green and the red. It felt like they were suffocating perhaps due to years of using bleaching creams.
” Morili, why would you do that? What happened?” I faced Morili. She broke down in tears as if she had no prior knowledge of why the whole fight had started “How did I body shame her, what did I do? I only saw an advert of a brand that sells plus size lingerie and I shared with her, is that body shaming? Sharing useful information with my friend?” Morili explained, stretching forth her hands like a guiltless housewife caught in bed with her concubine but who has genuine reasons to back up the act.
“Shut up,did I send you? Who told you I’m plus size, do you know my size more than I do? That’s how you told me to register at the gym beside your house, what’s your problem? I’m fine the way I’m. I’m eating well and not suffering like you that’s why I look like this, hater oshi. You will not face your life, because you’re dating Taye now, you think you are everybody’s spec. Taye that asked me out first that I rejected,oponu” Areni interrupted with a voice that projected her insecurity but a face of what they call “self-love” and pride. There was bitterness in her voice that showed that the fight was more than the Instagram thing she was laying claim to.
Women!! Always living complicated lives. Quick to show off friendship but it doesn’t always take time for the ship to sink. They are the ones to give their friends all sorts of pet names from bestie to sugarcane to Berry berry. There is no sweet name that isn’t in their friendship dictionaries. But all don’t take long to get sour. I was confused at what to say to appease to both of them. If I should mention that Morili wasn’t wrong, I won’t hear the end of it from Areni. Supporting Areni will make me a staunch enemy of Morili even if they get to settle their rift.
I was running late for the football match I was going to watch, but I had to make peace and leave as soon as possible. Deep down, I felt Morili shouldn’t have shared such information with Areni. I mean it is a very sensitive topic. No one tells a woman she is adding weight nowadays. A comment as basic as ‘Can you sit properly or please adjust, you have taken all the space’ in public transport could cause trouble. It doesn’t make sense but then Morili should have known better. Before I could think of what to say, Morili roared like a lion to interrupt my thought.
“See! because I’m looking at you abi, you think you can run your mouth. I heard everything you said about me in the last sisters’ circle meeting. The way you told them that I use to borrow clothes to snap but didn’t remember to tell them how you beg guys to give you money every day. Why didn’t you tell the sisters that you followed a physically challenged man out on a date just so you can snap at Eko hotel? You told them I slept with your ex, did you tell them I was his pick before you used that cele perfume to snatch him?” Morili clapped back
I knew there was more to the irreproachable attitude she gave at first but I didn’t expect she would switch so quick. Last I checked, both were “crushing” over each other on Instagram. Best friends forever, Two-day goal. How could all these be coming out here? “That escalated so fast” I mumbled, trying to control my laughter at the ridiculous things I just heard.
“You still have the mouth to talk? Have you finished paying the balance of your iPhone money? Answer now? Have you finished paying? Fake girl, ‘miss poorpular’. Sebi I’m collecting money from guys, I’m not like you who pretend to be helping poor people to raise money only to divert such money for personal use. Do you think I didn’t know how you forged fake hospital reports recently, snapped the wounded leg of the mad man on the street and put on social media to raise funds? Or the fake poster of almsgiving society? Don’t get me started baby girl”
That was more than I could just take. At that point, I thought to myself “this battle is for the gods.” I had heard enough, not more, please. The god of soccer was calling out to me, so I heeded his call.